By Susan Ciancio
Behind nearly every great son is a very special mother. This week, we celebrate both a mother and her son, as August 27 is the Feast of St. Monica, and the 28th is feast of her son, St. Augustine. St. Monica prayed for many years for the conversion of her wayward son, even following him to Italy when he tried to evade her.
As we know, God always hears our prayers. Yet He answers them in His time.
It took years for Augustine to change his behaviors and follow Christ, but he eventually renounced his sinful life. He became a priest, then later a bishop, and finally one of the most famous Catholic theologians of all time. He made a significant impact on those in his life and throughout the Church by helping the poor, denouncing heresies, and teaching the faith.
Yet, as a young man, Augustine thought he could never live a pure life and be a “good” Christian, so his early attempts at it were feeble. We see evidence of this in the story of two men who were so moved by the teachings of St. Anthony of the Desert that they immediately converted. It troubled Augustine because he felt ashamed—ashamed because he had not yet had that same experience. It is said that he flung himself on the ground and cried out to God, “How long more, O Lord? Why does not this hour put an end to my sins?” At that moment, he heard a child sing “Take up and read.” So Augustine opened a book containing the letters of St. Paul and read the first thing his eyes fell upon. In that letter, St. Paul said to imitate Jesus and put away all impurities. That was just the inspiration Augustine needed, and from that moment on, he changed his life.
Do we also need a wake-up call?
We may sometimes find ourselves a lot like the St. Augustine of the early days. It’s hard to always do the right thing. We falter. We sin. We despair. We pick ourselves up and try again. But then something happens, and we lose faith in ourselves. Sometimes we even lose faith in God. We act more as agents of the culture of death than as agents of a culture of life.
God’s hand in St. Augustine’s life illustrates many important things. Most importantly, it teaches us about God’s infinite mercy. God is not a petulant child who is so hurt by our sins that He stamps His foot and walks away from us. He does not hold grudges when we hurt Him. He does not punish us by making bad things happen here on Earth. Yes, we deeply wound God by our sins. Yes, someday we will have to atone for them. But God will never leave us. He is here with us always, even when we think we don’t want Him. He is our one constant, and He tells us this repeatedly.
No matter what happens in life, no matter what we go through, He is always there. Whether we scorn Him, push Him away, or forget about Him, He remains. Not only is He simply there, but He is there with open arms to welcome us back, just as the father did in the parable of the Prodigal Son.
If you have fallen away, pick yourself up. If you are doing less than you should, do more. If you are diligently praying for someone or something, keep trusting that God loves you and is working with you. If you find yourself falling away from the faith, gaze upon the crucifix and see Christ’s love.
St. Augustine once cried out to God, “Too late I have loved you.”
Let us pray—today and every day—that those are words we never have to utter. And let us pray that we can become more like St. Monica and more like her converted son as we work to shine Christ’s light throughout our dark world.